May 18, 2010

It’s not you, it’s me.

May 2001

When we first met, you seemed perfect and I couldn’t think of anything I wanted more.  I saw my future with you.  Laid out in front of me.  Beautiful.  With Big Daddy and the Princess you could have been everything I wanted.

And for a long time, you were.  I loved your tall windows.  I loved your high ceilings.  I loved my giant bedroom.  I loved the Princess’s sunny room at the end of the hall.  I loved my postage stamp yard.  I loved the banister that I wound garlands around during fall and Christmas.

The Princess-September 2001

I loved that my sweet baby girl was growing up here.  I loved the tree lined streets and the neat park where she leaned to slide and climb.

You are the only home my three babies have known.  Even though we lived in Michigan for two years, this is the only house the Princess remembers.  It’s the home we brought Littlebit and Baby Bee home to as newborns.    This is their only home.  our home.

The Princess and Littlebit-December 2008

It’s not that there is anything really wrong with you.  You still have lovely tall windows and high ceilings.   You still over look the marsh and the redwinged blackbirds still gather on the deck to sing.  You still have friendly tree lined streets and the neat little park where Littlebit has learned to climb and slide.

The truth is, we’ve just outgrown you.  In more ways than one.

Nevermind the two tiny bedrooms upstairs and the three growing girls.

Nevermind the postage stamp yard with a huge deck that precludes little legs from running and playing.

Nevermind the shared well whereby we can play name that tune to the neighbor’s surround sound.

We have dreams.  Things we want to do and I’m sorry to say they don’t include you.  They just don’t.

I’m sure as we count down and the days grow shorter and shorter here, I’ll become more sad.  This is, afterall, our home.  Their home.

Littlebit and Baby Bee-April 2010

I’m sure you’ll find someone new.  Someone who will see for how lovely you are.  Someone will love your tall windows and high ceilings.  They’ll love your postage stamp yard.  They’ll think your two tiny bedrooms are perfect for their kids or their plans.  They’ll love you like we did.

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