Disclosure Notice

To make sure that I’ve met any possible disclosure requirements for my blog, I’d like to state first hand that I don’t accept sponsorships, advertising or any sort of “paid opportunity”. Any product or company I mention on my blog is something I’ve used and paid for myself out of Big Daddy’s pocket and I’ve received no compensation for anything I plug here. It was a decision I made many years and and while I’m probably the ONLY blogger in existence who doesn’t have ads, sponsorship or free “swag” sitting around, I’m comfortable with you. You, dear reader, know that if I recommend anything; from a clothing store to a type of chicken broth, it’s something I’ve bought, used and loved.

34 Comments Add yours

  1. Ellen Yula says:

    I want to thank you for an invaluable description your words taught me from a Pin on pinterest. You’ve helped me retire grief permanently because you made me understand it’s ‘why’. Bless your writings and your life. I then traced the words to your blog source to find it was said about Max and ultimately? about your Mom. They were both so lucky to have you in their lives. You are an Enricher. Thank you for enriching mine. And here is how:

    “Grief, I’ve learned, is really love. It’s all the love you want to give but cannot give. The more you loved someone, the more you grieve. All of that unspent love gathers up in the corners of your eyes and in that part of your chest that gets empty and hollow feeling. The happiness of love turns to sadness when unspent. Grief is just love with no place to go.” ~ J.W.A

    1. Jamie says:

      Ellen, I cannot begin to thank you enough for this wonderful comment. When I read it this past weekend, it took my breath away for a little bit. I never expected that something I wrote could resonate with people in this way. I’m so, so glad that it did with you and that it has with others. I have never been called an Enricher and it is a compliment of the highest order. Thank you. Really. From the very, very bottom of my heart. <3

  2. Kathy says:

    I’ve seen the uncredited quote of the paragraph about grief being “unspent love” at your link below…from March 2014 Is that original with you? I saw it today on Second Firsts’ fb page, and decided to try to find its origination via google. SO far yours is the earliest occurance I can find.


    1. Jamie says:

      Hi Kathy!

      I checked out your link and those words in that graphic are mine, verbatim, as you now know. I know there is an author floating a similar concept in a book she has written, but as with all ideas I can’t say, for certain, that I never subconsciously absorbed that idea from someone else, so I’m hesitant to get cranky about it. I was able to read the comments under the image and I thank you, sincerely, for crediting me. It brings me a lot of happiness to know that something I’ve said has been helpful to others. <3

      1. Kathy says:

        Hey jamie– you probably know Eric and your friend Cindy piped up too! :-) I discovered the quote has really made the rounds, so probably too late correct the attribution. It’s taken on a life of its own. But maybe that has it’s own satisfaction. Blessings!


        1. Jamie says:

          Christina did amend her posting of the image, which is great. I’ve always said I wanted my readership to grow organically and so I’m taking this as a positive. Thank you for looking out for me, Kathy. <3 I appreciate it.

          1. Maggie says:

            Hi Jamie, I’m curious as to what author you mention that has been saying something similar to what you originally wrote. I need to read him or her! Please comment about the book you heard! Thank you.

          2. Jamie says:

            Hey Maggie! I’ll do some googling and e-mail you!

  3. Cynthia says:

    “Grief, I’ve learned, is really love. It’s all the love you want to give but cannot give. The more you loved someone, the more you grieve. All of that unspent love gathers up in the corners of your eyes and in that part of your chest that gets empty and hollow feeling. The happiness of love turns to sadness when unspent. Grief is just love with no place to go.”
    *****I love this quote so much. I just experienced a very profound and devastating loss and I have read this over and over and have begun to internalize it. Thank you. It’s brilliant.

    1. Jamie says:

      I am so sorry for your loss and I’m glad something I’ve said has helped you in any small way. <3

  4. Bobbie Goettee says:

    Your story about Max, your Mom and grief has made my day so much easier. So very well written and all makes sense as I grieve over the loss of my dear twin sister 7 weeks ago. How do I deal with my loss??? I am putting your article on my fridge to read daily. Thank you!

    1. Jamie says:

      Bobbie, that is such a great compliment. I’m so sorry for the loss of your sister. <3

  5. Kacey says:

    Thank you so much for your words about grief. It made me feel so much better to know that it’s okay to mourn and cry for my mom, 6+ years since she passed, because it means I love her that much. I’ve also just shared your words with two friends who lost loved ones in the past week, and it brought them great comfort.

    God bless you for using His gift of written expression.

    1. Jamie says:

      Thank you for your kind words, Kacey. My Mom has been gone just about ten years and grief is still my partner, sometimes. It will always be because I’m going to love her until I’m done. <3

  6. Ruben says:

    The description you write…of grief…is finally giving vocabulary to what I’ve been feeling this last month. Thank you.

    1. Jamie says:

      I’m so glad those thing were helpful for you, Ruben. I’m so sorry for your loss.

  7. Joanna says:

    You made a beautiful quote about grief and I am wondering if I could quote you? I dabble in writing and may or may never write a book but I would like your permission to use this quote in my book if it ever becomes that??;-). The way you put it is so well done.

  8. Rory says:

    Prolific, indeed, gives me a physical understanding of what I felt for the past seven years,. and tomorrow…. and forever.

  9. Joanne Davison Miller says:

    Thank you for your writings. They are magnificent. My heart feels better for them. To be understood is a rare thing in grief it seems.

    Please continue to comfort this world with your words. Today you have comforted mine.

  10. Toni Locke says:

    I am a calligrapher (on good days when my arthritis is not in control of my hands). I would very much like to use a quotation from your column about losing Max for the front of a card I intend to reproduce for condolences, full paragraph of “Grief, I’ve learned, is really just love. . . . love with no place to go.” I would credit you beneath the quotation and place the full address of your blog on the back of the card. The cards would just be for my personal use, but I need your permission. I would not use the quotation without your permission. I would be willing to pay a fee for the copy rights if necessary.
    My grandson died in a wreck last February, exactly one month shy of his 26th birthday. Your statement was shared with my daughter (his mother) and I have shared it on my Facebook page. It is incredibly insightful as well as concise. Thank you for sharing your personal thoughts with such talent on your blog.

  11. susan dalby says:


    I’m another who was lucky to have a good friend send your words…we lost our beautiful, strong,witty, charming, talented, loving, generous, kind Mother, the evening of the 23rd. An unbearable conclusion to a month of horrific events and challenges . Finally she could not go on, squeezed a nurse’s hand and died.

    I am so grateful to your words, and will share them, and your authorship with any and all I love and know are grieving, too.


    1. Jamie says:

      Susan, I am so sorry for the loss of your mother. There is never a good time to lose your Mom. You’ll never be old enough and the time of year will always be awful. I’m glad these words have helped you. <3

  12. Jenny Parnwell says:

    My brother has just sent me your words on Grief ….and I read your blog about Max, and your Mom. My daughter died 15 years ago, aged 33, and my husband died last year. It really resonates with how I feel. Thank you, Jamie.

    1. Jamie says:

      I’m so sorry for your losses, Jenny, and I’m glad my words could help you. <3

  13. Carol says:

    I too was touched by the “quote about grief”. Thank you for putting into words what most of us feel.

    1. Jamie says:

      Thanks for your kind words

  14. Jennifer M. K. says:

    I’m grieving the loss of my mother and just…thank you. A cousin posted your “grief, I’ve learned, is really love quote” as author unknown and it really helped today, so I wanted to share it and properly credit it if I could. (Do you spell your last name Anerson or Anderson?) Now though, I just want to say thank you. Thank you for sharing your gift and your heart, for making the world a little better.

    1. Jamie says:

      I’m glad what I wrote has helped you in any way. Thank you for wanting to credit me. My last name is Anderson. :)

  15. Abigail says:

    I have to thank you for the piece you wrote on grief that Ellen quoted below.
    It is a shaft of light from beyond the veil between us and ? It is inspired.
    I call the ? God but I don’t know you well enough to know if you do. I found this piece by you, this paragraph, on Facebook and copied it into my journal over a year ago. It touches me in the deepest place in my heart.

    My parents immigrated to Canada in 1956. We have no relatives here. No grandparents, aunts, uncles or cousins. When I was in grade 7 (about1970) we went as a family to England to meet my relatives. On the night before we left to come home we all gathered together for a meal and I started to cry and cry and cry. I remember the intense pain in my throat and the ache in my heart knowing we would be leaving all these new-to- me family members. I was teased and shamed for my tears. No one else was crying and I couldn’t understand why I was suffering while everyone else seemed happy. But now I do. Since reading that one paragraph you wrote, I understand.

    I have been called: soppy, fragile, a nuisance, and an annoyance for my tears over the years. But I’m not ashamed when I realize they are an expression of love. Thank you!

  16. I’d like to share a quote from your site, with attribution of course. The quote is, “Grief, I’ve learned, is really love. It’s all the love you want to give but cannot give. The more you loved someone, the more you grieve. All of that unspent love gathers up in the corners of your eyes and in that part of your chest that gets empty and hollow feeling. The happiness of love turns to sadness when unspent. Grief is just love with no place to go.”

    May I?

    1. Jamie says:

      I’m happy to allow sharing of the quote, attributed, of course, and with a link if possible.

  17. Dena Dodd says:

    Read your poem on Grief and went to you post about Max. I’m gonna read more of your writings along and would like to be on your email list if possible. Lost my mom 2yrs ago and just suddenly were very shocked to learn my dad has stage 4 lung cancer which has spread all over and 5 tumors in his brain. We had NO IDEA! He has very limited time and in hospice care. Similar situation. Cancer is just so unfair!

  18. Tess says:

    Love what you wrote. Some people are not able to express their feelings in words. They appreciate and are able to relate to what others are able to express. Thank you for sharing.

  19. Gabriel says:

    This morning, on NPR, I listened to a story about the suicide rate amongst American farmers. This was a Story Corps recording, and centered around a specific incident of a wife whose husband joined that number. In the story she said that she had read somewhere that “Grief is love with no place to go.” The quote struck me so poignantly that I had to find its source. It’s quoting was accurate, Jaime, with the omission of the word “just.”

    It is so true and penetrating I thought to make this comment.

    So now you know that literally millions have heard your inspired words.

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